I'd like to share with you where I've been for the past 6 months.   Lost, confused, questioning, uncertainty, and doubt are a few words that can describe it.  One of the main goals of the clergy here and of Enki and those with Him is the gaining of knowledge, boundless evolution of the soul and bringing humanity to where it was originally intended to be.  But along this journey of searching and coming into our own, we may come across many different views and different religions.  Basically, these different views are neither good, nor bad, but the expression of the experiences of those also moving through this journey.  There are those who choose to intentionally mislead.  For those who have read my 'Searching for Answers' sermon, THE final answer, the almighty truth may not be right there for us to grab as this would take away self discovery and the gift of free will and individual thought.  It's important for us to take the experiences in life and the information we become enlightened to and rather being told exactly what it means, see what it means to us and see what we can learn and apply these things to our lives.  This is the case with others in other 'religions' and other books and websites that are available.  They are following their own hearts and seeing where it leads them.  In this process, they feel these beliefs very strongly and wish to share and express these beliefs via internet, books, etc.  With all the available information and  the sharing of personal experiences, those also doing the searching may come across the different views which can lead not only to expanding one's mind and the gaining of knowledge, but also confusion, over thinking, and getting lost in the search for answers.  This was the case for me.  I was taking in too much information in too short of time.   I was reading a couple books a month as well as websites.  I'd read a couple books on the same issue and then read a couple books on something different relating to spirituality.  Then, between reading different books, I'd  go to different websites on something different.  My intent was not disrespectful, but to read as much as I could to become a more well rounded spiritual person.  Even question this path as we are encouraged to do hence self discovery and free thought.  I became very lost in the information, yet I learned so much and expanded my mind and got an idea of what's out there and got to know other peoples' visions and experiences.  Every rose has it's thorn as they say.  But it did consume me.  I couldn't escape it.  I drowned in it.  I became a prisoner in my own mind.  I'd sit there for hours, mixing and matching all of this different information.  Each new book, each new website I went to became a piece of the puzzle.  I knew I couldn't solve this puzzle as this takes many many lifetimes.  The Gods are still learning.  We all are.  But I saw more and more pieces before me.  The picture became more vast.  My mind was expanding, but the thorn dug deeper.  I got to the point to where I couldn't calm my mind . I was consumed and my mind in shackles.  I actually had tears in my eyes with my head in my hands at times.  I was only making things worse for myself.  I also had some angelic influence mixed in there as well.  But, it was a learning experience.  Sometimes expanding one's mind can be difficult when one breaks free of their programmed way of thinking and living.  It can be a little uneasy when you see how vast the information can be.  One can lose themselves which is what happened to me.  I learned, but learned the hard way.  Now I understand why the Gods' give us information and move us along at a slower, controlled pace.  Why baby steps are the right way to go.  So that way we can allow new information to settle and we become comfortable and understand, and also that we may make our own choice and express our free thought.  As lost in the information we may become and as un-grounded as we may feel, there is one thing we must keep in mind, we are spiritually evolving beings.  We are here, existing, living and thriving.  You are you.  You just are.  You are accomplishing things that most don't even know about.  If you've chosen to dedicate as the clergy here have, you have become part of something much bigger.   What's important to remember, is that to settle on one thing, one way of thinking, one 'religion', is to in a way bind yourself.  It's a way of limiting yourself.  It's suffocating.  But use my example when pursuing a lot of other reading.  I encourage people to do as much reading and questioning as possible.  Some people don't have these issues as they can pull their mind away and control it better than I.  But for those new or perhaps in the situation I was in,  take things in stride.  Sit back and think on things.  Never be afraid to question, but be smart about it.  Take baby steps with the information.  If you found you're in deep and extremely lost and have a million different views, questions, and conflicting information in your head, then simply stop reading and pursuing it for a while.  I haven't read a book or viewed another site in a good month now.  You're not expected to bury yourself in books, websites, and meditation every single day, month after month.  It's an evolution of yourself, not a cram session.  You're not expected to solve every puzzle, do every single meditation known to humankind, or read 50,000 books and become a human encyclopaedia before our time is done here.  Don't put pressure on yourself to impress the Gods and do everything right.  Breathe!  Relax.  Enjoy life as well.  Find a way to get your mind off of the info. Put the info aside for a while.  Enjoy a hobby you love, or pick up a new one.  The Gods don't expect you to lock yourself in your room reading everything and meditating and escape life for hours on end.  Enjoy life to it's fullest as well.   Our stay here is a gathering of experiences.  When you feel that urge again to pick up a book on a certain subject, then do it.  Just keep in mind what happens when you take in too much and pursue too much information on too many different conflicting topics.  Don't just be alive.......................LIVE!!!!!

 

if you wish to speak to us about any of this please feel free to use the forums.

* Back to Sermons Page *

________________________________